Dissecting My Lunacy…among other things

Tales from a distressed hermit who just learned to read Progressed Charts while laughing at vibrator mysteries of Mercury Rx — WHAT? Yeah. It seems that Mercury decided not to just make charging my laptop and phone difficult, but now even my effin vibrator is joining the strike.

Noonie noo. Anyway.

‘Sup Cult? How’s it crackin? A few blogs ago I rambled about being alive and seeing the light, and hahahahha….hahahhahah…hahahhahahhaha yup sure. Splat. Ah life. Nice try.

I really am starting to dislike this side of me. I don’t like bewailing. I don’t like being so fucking emotional. Emotions are fine. Emotions are important. I like crying from time to time, it’s healing and refreshing. BUT MY GHOD. MUST I BE SAD EVERY OTHER DAY? MUST I FLOAT THE ETHERS LIKE A PRUNED WOMAN? I’M SO FUCKING TIRED OF IT. Like STOP.

But it is what it is, and I’m not gonna pretend I don’t feel my feelings. I do. I do feel these little pieces of poop that are swelling inside and around me, and I can’t sweep them under a rug, and I can’t seem to make them magically go away either like I used to. The energy has indeed shifted, and I truly AM much more magical than I was let’s say, a month ago. But it’s still not Brit. It’s still not 100% Brit. I fucking miss Brit. Where the fuck is she?

As you all know, I’m learning Astrology. 10 months in, and I just learned about progressed charts. I actually watched Kelly Surtees teach this a few months ago, but for the life of me, my brain just couldn’t understand what she was talking about. It just seemed so complicated and a waste of time. So I put it aside, and told myself “later” along with Zodiacal Releasing which again, just seems like a headache. Later.

So what the hell am I talking about? Secondary Progressions and Zodiacal Releasing are just two examples of TIMING TECHNIQUES that can be used to “predict” (take note of the ” “) a person’s life. I say “predict” because c’mon. Even as a tarot reader, I always tell my new clients that if they want a Magic 8 Ball experience or a fortune teller, then to find someone else. So anyway back to me.

Let’s do a quick…very very quick, background of Brit’s Natal Chart.

I’m Sagittarius Rising and Leo Sun. And for those of you who don’t not know what that means, it means I’M AN ARROGANT FUCK. Lol. I think I’m the shit. I know I’m the shit. And I preach about how I’m the shit. Dude, I’m the shit. Facts are facts. What are my facts based on? Be quiet, just trust me.

Then! Surprise surprise, I’m a Capricorn Moon. WHAAAAAAT? When I first found out I was a Capricorn Moon I rejected it as if someone was handing their baby to me. Capricorns have been stereotyped as cold and old. No way am I that. No way. But as I got deeper and deeper, I realized, Holy Hell. I am a Capricorn Moon. I’m a prudish grandmother with her morals and high nose who thinks TikTokers need to sit down.

Let’s take a look at exhibits A, B and C thru my favorite source of reliable information, memes:

“But Brit, you’re a healer. You talk to your clients and love them and guide them.” – says innocent you.
“Ha!” – says me.

Look, I know this sounds contradictory. But yes of course I care. But I also don’t. I’ll leave it up to you to figure that out.

My cult knows that when I work, I have a cast iron pan ready to smack them with when they repeat age old lessons that have skid marks and need to be learned already.

Anyway I digress. But you feel my energy? I’m a know-it-all prick who gallops the fields sprinkling the Universe with glitter and memes, and THAT is a testament to the work I do. It really is. (I swear I’m a professional. Not lately, but I swear I normally am).

So color me shocked when I started to lose this sparkle. Yada yada yada boring boring, I’ve talked about this already before (go a few blogs back, you’ll read about my deaths and whatnot). But last week as I dug more and more into the rabbit hole of astrology, I found it. Well…kinda. Let’s break it down:

January 2022. Jesus motherf*ckin Christ. January 2022. I swear this is what started it all. I’ve mentioned this date 10 million times to everyone, but seriously. It really all makes sense. In this period of time…

1. My health problems started. I was doing mighty fine for 39 years, then bam! Guess what b*tch, your back is gonna hurt and WebMD is gonna tell you you’re dying.
2. The entire month, something was in the air. I didn’t know what it was but I could just feel it. It was so palpable and it made me nervous.
3. I met someone who would forever change the course of my life. It was like opening Pandora’s Box and I’m still swimming in the cocktail of delusion, emotional cocaine and hangover soup.

Now, all these things took MONTHS to truly manifest to their peak levels, but it all started then. Astrologically, these things happened:

1. Venus Rx in Capricorn
2. The lunar nodes shifting signs
3. And finally…my Progressed Moon went into the 7th house of Cancer. It’s also waving “hi” to my North Node cuz why not.

My natal Moon is in 2nd House Capricorn, but starting January 2022, an added layer of Moon in Cancer in the fucking 7th house of relationships was parading its way into my cool girl exterior. “You think you’re so cool? Try having DEEP EMOTIONS!” Hahahhahahahahhahaha.

So there’s not much I can do about it except to go along this journey. I will continue being more sensitive and more emotional until December 31, 2023. That’s when I progress once again, this time to Moon in Leo. Thank fuck cuz I need my spark back.

But while I’m still here, I might as well use this Cancer Moon wisely. Yes I will continue to feel things deeper, yes I might continue to feel sorrow… but now I can work with it in a better way. I can miss who I miss, I can reject who I want to reject, I can cry if I want to cry… but sometimes, simply knowing the diagnosis really shifts the perspective and gives you a sense of control over the situation. In the end, I’m going to have to learn to manage being an emotional wreck and having it all together. At the same time.

That being said, I’m excited for the future. Without getting too deep into the astrological jargon, it seems like I am ending a major part of my life cycle soon, and will start many different chapters within the next few months and years.

Aight, I guess that’s it for this nonsensical post. I apologize for wasting 5 minutes of your precious time. (silence) No I’m not.

ciao,
brit